A current golden calf.

(that I've noticed)

The story of the golden calf in Exodus is applicable to so much in our culture today.

Essentially, we move away from what’s important or what’s necessary or what we’ve been led to do, and we deify something else. It could be anything, really, but we become so hyper-focused on a rule of our own making that we lose the plot.

So I have to ask: Is it possible to make an idol of protecting your kids online?

I had this thought recently. Some moms go to so. much. effort to make sure any little face doesn't end up on the screens. I get it. We are our children's advocates and protectors. I don't post just any picture and I used the Close Friends feature on Instagram most of the time, even though my account is on private. However... doesn't it take twice as much work, effort, and time spent pondering social media to operate in a way that never discloses your children...face, name, or otherwise? 

I've done it all: I've watermarked in the past, I've not posted as many pictures, I've not over-shared random details. But being secretive about it just comes across as superiority. I do think it’s weird that I know the names and birthdays of children of bloggers. I have a really good memory, and the details burned into my brain about complete strangers’ children…well, it all takes up a lot of space.

But I'd rather someone overshare than vague-blog. At least with an over-sharer, I can cringe and move on with my day. Vague-blogging about any subject usually ties into self-importance. Overly flowery writing, not giving any actual detail, just gives me a headache. It’s a form of Social Media Word Salad, if you will.

I try to be as open as I can with what I want to talk about...deployments, infertility, teaching. If I don't want the world to know about it, I don't post about it. I understand having actual security concerns (I have those too; I don't post certain things for a reason), but even if you put your child's name out there, life will go on. 

So the alternative, I suppose, is to scrub the internet of any mention of your child, ever. Today's kids are growing up much differently than we did, but they're basically all growing up in that way. While millenials were recorded on bulky video cameras and disposable camera film was developed at the local pharmacy, today’s kids are photographed by their parents dozens of times a day and the pictures are shared instantaneously. I have more videos of my first child than I know what to do with and, go ahead, ask me how many times I’ve rewatched any of them (once, maybe).

When you spend more time figuring out how to disguise your child and not post them and/or describe them vaguely, this seems to be the golden calf of a subset of the internet right now. There are so many caveats here, of course: posting when they ask you not to or taking constant pictures just to post them or not allowing them agency is different. And baby/toddler shaming with younger kids is also gross. You won't find weird, overly messy, or compromised pictures of my kids online.

I’m not even saying that it’s right or wrong to give out no information about your children online. I do have a hat in this ring but I haven’t actually decided what the answer is for me, even. I’m simply asking if, maybe, it’s become an idol in our current world.

However, a thought I can’t get out of my head is:

Vague-blogging kids reminds me, a lot actually, of how we've basically forced kids into hiding over the last few years. Masks, lockdowns, quarantines. We've normalized kids not being there and that's not..normal?

Anyway, that was a ramble at the end there. I suppose the point is: Post nothing. Or posting something. No one likes a vague-poster.